Conquering fears. Thank you sparkly vampires.

I do a lot of things that frighten me. Most recently, I've moved to another state, leaving my friends, family and fiance behind. I've bared my soul for the judgment of others (aka this blog and applying to Phd school). I've even taken on more tasks than any human has time for (work, school, teaching, quasi-commuting). But I have not, until this very evening, gone to the movies by myself.

Yes, I realize that is a bit of an anticlimactic revelation considering the aforementioned activities, but seriously, I was terrified! I've tried once before. I figured it was much like dining alone. That I can do. Just me and a good book, or better, papers to highlight. But this was different. Food is for sustenance, it has purpose. But movies are entertainment, frivolity to be shared. Movies are what you do with your friends or on date night or for special occasions with the fam. Who goes to movies alone? Losers, I thought!!

WRONG! Cool people go to movies alone. Case in point me and the other chick in row three seeing New Moon this afternoon. Okay, I'm stretching but come along with me for a minute. The coolness is not inherent in the movie going, but in the fear conquering! I felt so self-conscious at first, as if the 15-year-old vampire freaks in the back row or the emasculated boyfriend on his hot date were actually paying attention to me with my small popcorn, coke and neuroses. Well guess what? No one heckled the lonely girl. Nope, they let me just revel in my sparkly vampire fantasies with a whole row to myself. It was lovely.

And so, the application to the rest of life: Don't let fear get you down! People really aren't paying that much attention and even if they are, who the hell cares?! Go to that movie, join that gym, ask that girl out. Submit that article, apply to grad school, quit your job if you need to. Just do it! To (probably inappropriately) quote FDR: "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." So go my friends and conquer your fears. (And perhaps, let me know about it!)

xoxo,
shawna

P/S Regarding the sparkly vampires, I'm still squarely Team Edward, but I must admit I could do some cheer leading for Team Jacob's Abs. I can't lie!

PP/S In case any of you wonder, yes Mr. T knows about the sparkly vampire fetish and he STILL loves me. It's great.

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